my silly little “personal mottos” (& what they really mean)
it's like "YOLO" but for grown-ups! + bookclub & journaling adventures.
primarily books and my thoughts about them, with the occasional observation, rambling, or creative endeavor.
YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I was but a wee college freshman when this life changing motto, coined by a young aubrey graham, entered my consciousness. I wish I could articulate why this exremely obvious phrase was so groundbreaking and revelatory for college aged students. “you only live once,” we would shrug nonchalantly as we guzzled water bottles full of straight vodka mixed with crystal lite packets. “you only live once!” we would yell sloppily right before making questionable and dangerous choices with our one wild and precious life.
two of my college friends were mary cate and rebecca. we made a well rounded trio as a future teacher, school counselor, and lawyer. as far as college partying went, we partook, but we weren’t out of control. we were more interested in the finer things in life, like sussing out the best scallion pancakes within a 10 mile radius1. I don’t remember who of us first uttered these words, but the phrase “if not now, when?” became the motto of our friendship for years to come.
the beauty of a motto like this is, it works for almost everything. as a full-time procrastinator for things I find both non-preferred AND enjoyable, I can convince myself (or my friends could convince me) to get out of my comfort zone, or get out of my own way with just these these four simple words.
we should go try the scallion pancakes at that restaurant across the bridge
ugh, it’s a tuesday though and I just had a 3 hour long lecture class
yeah, but like… if not now, when?
so you’re thinking about applying to grad school?
yes but it’s such a major life decision
okay but girl, if not NOW, WHEN!?
unbelievable the range this simple phrase has, from the most mundane (opening your mail! making an amazon return!) to the most life changing (moving to a new city! making a career change!)
literally… if not now, when?
in recent months, sara & I have developed a new personal motto for ourselves (mostly for me because I could probably go days without leaving the condo, happily reading a book on the couch). this motto is (embarrassingly and stated somewhat satirically) “we’re so young and fun!”
we’re so young and fun, so we went to a women’s college basketball game on a wednesday evening!
we’re so young and fun that NOT EVEN A FULL WEEK LATER, we went to a taylor swift trivia night at a brewery on a monday(!!!!!!) who am I?!
what does we’re so young & fun really mean? it digs at the root of a deep fear of mine, and maybe yours too. that as I get older, it will become harder to cultivate the kind of life I want and crave - one full of adventure, spontaneity and novel experiences. one where I’m not feeling so young and fun, more like old and (what word is the opposite of fun…) afraid?
there is nothing wrong with getting older. however, there are few examples in my personal life of aging that is graceful or exciting. the message that has been delivered to me over and over again is that age equates to getting tired, health concerns, diminished mobility/agility, and becoming “stuck in your ways”. I’m an introverted homebody, but I don’t want to become stuck. I want to continue experiencing all that life has to offer, staying mentally young and fun, no matter my age.
here’s to the personal mottos/mantras/affirmations that get us unstuck, out of our comfort zones, and out there livin’ life.
other ideas for fun personal mottos
(& what they really mean):
how important is it, really? = I am prioritizing only that which feeds my soul.
like taylor said, shake it off = I will not let minor negativity chip away at my spirit.
better out than in I always say = I am using my voice to speak up for myself instead of keeping important ideas & thoughts inside.
my vibe right now is just living life (I need this sticker) = I am in a season of going with life’s ebbs & flows, despite fear of the unknown.
📚 currently reading
❋ the 7 1/2 deaths of evelyn hardcastle ~ by stuart turton
having so much fun with this absolute PAGE-TURNER. this fulfills the “told in a non-linear timeline” prompt in my 52 book club journal - the narrator wakes up in one of 8 characters each time they fall asleep and must solve evelyn’s murder before the 8th time or be trapped in the blackheath estate forever. I’m about 40% into this magical realism mystery book, totally hooked, and still totally lost on how everything will tie together.
🐛 itching to start
❋ everyone in my family has killed someone ~ by benjamin stevenson
my favorite booktuber read this locked room mystery for a recent video and clearly had an absolute blast with it. described as “fresh and zingy as a salted lime” by aj finn, it’s made its way to the top of my tbr pile.
I have finally found the perfect home in my planner line-up for my adorable hobonichi a6. it functions as my work/brain dump planner on my office desk at school.
it’s unbelievable how much more motivated I am to get tasks done at work when I can physically cross them off by bubbling in a circle with my 0.4 pentel energel clena. I love how my school counseling nonsense and reminders so quickly fill these itty bitty pages. I love having a zippered case full of my zebra mildliners on hand to add a sprinkle of color and pizzazz. mostly, I love that I’ve found a home for this cutie little planner that I adore - it lives at work, on my desk, and fulfills my need to journal functionally during the 8-3 (an educator’s version of the 9-5).
have you achieved planner peace?
have you ever taken a social media break?
this recent read about quitting instagram really resonated - instagram feels so impersonal and the number that it can do on my productivity and personal joy is too real.
I’m a very all or nothing person. I can get sucked into tiktok for two straight hours, or not open the app at all for two straight weeks. balance is so difficult to strike and maintain when it comes to these instant dopamine gold mines. I wonder about taking extended breaks. friends communicate with me and show they’re thinking of me through these apps - sending me funny reels and memes that do often brighten up my day. how do we get the same effect if friends can’t contact me in the way they’re accustomed to? I’m open to any ideas to solve this communication conundrum.
toodles,
danielle
I cannot tell you or recall why we were so intensely hyperfocused on scallion pancakes from 2013-2014, and I honestly don’t know if I’ve had one since. it’s time to change that…